How does a friendship form? How does a relationship become an essential part of our lives?
One of my closest friends is Father Isaac. I first heard about him when we were both around 14 years old because we had mutual friends. We later attended seminary together, played on the same soccer teams, and spent a great deal of time around each other—but we still were not close friends.
That changed when we spent more than 22 hours together in a car, driving from Maryland back to Kansas. During that long journey, a genuine friendship began to form. We spent the following summer studying Spanish together, and our friendship continued to deepen. Today, he is one of my best friends. His friendship has become so woven into my life that his absence would leave a tremendous void.
Most meaningful relationships develop in a similar way. At first, we may simply know that someone exists. We may see that person occasionally or even have preconceived ideas about them. Then something happens: a conversation, an experience, or a shared moment. The relationship becomes personal and real.
Even after that defining moment, the relationship must continue to grow. A strong friendship or marriage does not develop instantly. Over time, it begins to shape our decisions, interests, priorities, and daily lives. Eventually, we may find it difficult to imagine life without that person.
In the Gospel passage of Matthew 13:24, Jesus uses parables to teach about the Kingdom of God. The Kingdom is not simply a place we hope to enter after death. Jesus himself reveals and embodies the Kingdom. Therefore, entering the Kingdom means entering into a relationship with Jesus Christ.
Jesus compares the Kingdom to a mustard seed. It begins as something very small but grows into something much greater. Our relationship with Christ often begins the same way.
For many of us, it began at baptism, perhaps when we were only a few days or weeks old. As children, we may have learned Bible stories, attended Catholic school or religious education, and gone to Mass with our families. Christ was present, but our relationship with Him may still have seemed distant or peripheral.
Then, perhaps, there came a moment when faith became personal. Jesus was no longer simply someone we had learned about. He became someone we knew. What began as a small seed started taking root and shaping our lives.
Jesus also compares the Kingdom to yeast mixed into flour. Yeast may seem insignificant, but it transforms the entire batch of dough. In the same way, our relationship with Christ is meant to transform every part of our lives. It gives greater meaning to our joys, struggles, relationships, work, and decisions.
What is the essential ingredient for a relationship to grow? Time.
A seed needs time to grow. Yeast needs time to work. Friendships and marriages need time to deepen. Our relationship with Jesus Christ also needs time.
One of the greatest spiritual challenges we face is busyness. We fill our days with work, entertainment, social media, news, and countless responsibilities. Our phones can tell us exactly how much time we spend on these things. It can be revealing to compare that number with the time we spend in prayer, silence, with our families, or in the presence of Christ.
Are we giving our relationship with Jesus the time it needs?
For some, the first step may be committing to Sunday Mass every week. For others, it may be spending one hour in Eucharistic Adoration or setting aside meaningful time for prayer each day.
Every time we come to the Eucharist, we place Christ at the center of our week. Little by little, His presence is meant to expand into the rest of our lives until our relationship with Him shapes everything.
Christ desires to be the most important relationship in our lives. Our part is simple: we must give that relationship time to grow.
Father Michael Brungardt, Assoc. Dir. of the St. Joseph House of Formation